Wisdom from Rumi

Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I'll meet you there

- Rumi
One of the most beautiful teachings from the Sufi Master Rumi is contained within the quote above. When we look at the world around us with logic, we give rise to a duality of what is good to bad and right or wrong, we cling to a standard that measures our tangible and intangible experiences, the more we do it the more it becomes a habit. A habit of being judgemental. We begin forming opinions about anything and everything. Little do we realize that the more opinions we form the more rigid we become thereby limiting our ability to see the world as it is. We end up seeing it as we want. Gaining true knowledge and wisdom then becomes a distant possibility. We accept the reality around us only through our personal lens & so distortions become inevitable.

The 5 types of people you should know about

Many of us go from being an introvert to an extrovert, mine is the same story. Working in a BPO back then in 2011, was way beyond an employment opportunity for me, it was a chance of connecting with a variety of people, this was a time that defined my transition towards becoming people oriented. I started making new friends, interacting with people who were completely different than me and so the story continues to the present day, the hunger for meeting new people and learning from

Learn as much as possible, as fast as possible

In past couple of months, I have been intrigued when I meet people who not just handle challenges effectively, but also triumph over them and lead by example. I have also met those who make erroneous decisions and act in a way that showcases lack of basic skills despite of being well-educated and well-traveled individuals. There are a number of reasons behind this distinction and one of them is 'Learning'.

Since past many years, I have interacted with and closely observed and learned from people from various professional backgrounds. Some of them are walking success stories and others are fighting life's most grueling failures with the hope of materializing their dreams. Although there are many lessons one can draw from them, but what tops the list is their ability to learn as fast as possible, and implement as soon as possible. This is a breed that welcomes failures. In fact, they never

Decoding some (tough) Questions

Before we begin, let us go through a couple of tough questions.

What is the purpose of my Life?
Why am I doing whatever it is that I am doing despite of knowing that I am not happy doing it?
Why do I feel like no one cares about me?
Why do I feel frustrated with myself and my Life for no reason?
Why do I feel like an under-achiever?

The list goes on.

In the last couple of months I have come across people, some of them use to ask at least one of the questions to themselves and some of them continue pondering over them even today. Surprisingly, they all are exceptionally

Things I would say to my 15 year old self

1. Do not be obsessed about getting approval or certification of your worth from people, this will screw your happiness big time. Remember, you were not born to please people but to fully utilize your potential and add meaning to your life and to those with whom you connect. Those who excel in life know what to take and what to ignore
2. You will be looked down upon by people no matter what status you achieve. Do not rely on appreciations for the sake of getting emotional gratification. Let your own passion and not external appreciation be be a driving force behind doing the great work that you do
3. Your looks come secondary but

The Power of NOW - A book review

How much do you live in the present moment?

Last month I read 'The Power of NOW" by Eckhart Tolle, a book that took me on journey within myself and surprised me with the simplicity that has been used to deliver a message that makes far more practical sense than millions of philosophy books out there on the shelf.

The book begins Eckhart's personal journey and gives us a glimpse of an experience that the author went through where he was on the brink of committing suicide and in the midst of extreme frustration he said to himself ,

"I can no longer live with myself"

What followed next was a heavy duty transformation which changed his life forever.

That was Eckhart's eureka moment which revealed to him that he has two distinct identities, on one side is the 'I' and on the other side, the 'self', which the 'I' can no longer live with. A shift in consciousness takes place in him and a presence of mind, free from any trail of thoughts, dawns on him. Eckhart uses the term, thoughtless presence to describe such a state.

The best part of this book is that it is NOT written in a typical theory format, like the way most psychological or spiritual books are written. The Power of NOW follows a 'Q & A' format where an imaginary interviewer who critically questions Eckhart about the need to stay in the NOW moment. The writing style makes us replace ourselves with the interviewer and assume that we are the ones having a conversation with Eckhart himself. As the chapters progress we see the message of the book evolving from psychology to philosophy and finally advancing towards a very simple yet powerful spiritual wisdom that works. However, it does not lose track of every day practical reality.

Below are a few bits and pieces of wisdom that I received from this incredible book, hope you find them inspiring the way millions of readers have.

• Be careful of all those moments when you are complaining, it carries an unconscious negative charge
• Do not dwell on the grievance too much, either change it, seek help to change it, if nothing works out then simply accept it, BUT do not dwell on it unnecessarily, there is absolutely nothing that you will gain out of it
• Wherever you are BE there totally
• To know if you are really living in the present, simply ask yourself if you are finding the current activity joyful or is it boring 
• If it is painful and you are still doing it then it means that you are hoping for some future gratification and using the present moment only as a means to an end
• In any given situation you have only 3 options:-
• Change it, if it is now favorable
• Leave it, if you cannot do anything about it
• Accept it totally without resistance
• When you find yourself in an emotional turmoil, just feel the pain fully without labeling it or thinking about it because doing so will imply your identification from it and so it becomes a long term process

It is not easy to stay in the present moment, however, if we were to even get short glimpses of the peace that we feel when we are totally present, we shall then know that there is indeed another way of life, far more fulfilling and happier than what we know of.

I would strongly suggest The Power of NOW for all those who are looking forward to learn the art of staying in the present. Staying in the present is of unavoidable importance as it enhances your productivity, unlocks your creative genius and most importantly improves your mental, emotional and physical well-being. 

Peace,

Rafaat Khan

Random thoughts on "Love"

I think that the foundation of any relationship and specially a romantic one is understanding and care.

If you understand me but do not care for me, then your understanding is of no value and the same is true when you care for me but understanding is missing. These two simplistic yet very meaningful words - Understand and Care, makes me conclude that "Love is simply a healthy blend of them both". Tomorrow is Valentine's day and like every year, gift shops will enjoy hefty sales of their merchandise, not to mention the flower sellers, who are going to rejoice for the same reason too and as we progress through 2015 we will again see many (not all but many) girlfriends-boyfriends of today ending their relationship due a plethora of known and unknown reasons.

What then is love? Things like buying gifts and being on Whatsapp for hours and meeting regularly over a coffee, are mere rituals which keeps a relationship alive, they are not the determinants of whether you both still love each other or not. These are simply ways of understanding each other on a more emotional and spiritual level. The question is- Is understanding and care going hand in hand? 

If understanding is accompanied with a lack of care then it simply means that your 'interest' in your partner is dying down (for whatever reasons) and if care is good but understanding is missing then sooner or later your partner will feel like he or she is with a mechanical caretaker and not a life partner.

To conclude, love is a blend of understanding and care and if any one out of these two is missing then a total collapse of what you perceive as 'Love' awaits you.

P.S. Just written my random thoughts down. . . simply a set of opinions and opinions are neither right nor wrong. However if you want to add something to this and fill the void in my understanding, do feel free to comment below...

 Peace,

 Rafaat Khan